list Monday - Puking

• vomiting
• throwing up
• up-chucking
• tossing doughnuts
• hurling
• yakking
• ralph
• chucking biscuits
• heaving
• be seasick
• disgorging
• regurgitating
• retching
• spewing
• barfing
• losing lunch
• spewing cookies
• technicolor yawning
• blowing chunks
• making love to the commode
• pray to the porcelain god

Week in Review

• Really needed to have a good week at work.  Had a great day Tuesday, but later was on track for a break even week.  And then, I really screwed up on Friday.  Making a mistake I would have made 8 months ago.  Stupid.  Back to the drawing board.
• Jilly  was home sick on Friday with possible food poisoning.  Puking her guts out.  Ate too many mushrooms.  Not kidding.  But, we really enjoyed both Italian meals that we went on courtesy of coupons from my parents.
• Josh has been a busy beaver, picking up some minor acting work lately.  So busy, that now he must join AFTRA, an actor's union.  And it ain't cheap!
• The wifey picked up a part-time gig - monitoring sun glass inventories at local retail establishments.  Sounds shady...lol.
• Men folk are getting haircuts.  Josh got the Bieber.  I got the buzz.
• Josh bought himself a basketball hoop.  (What a nightmare - 6 hours into the darkness putting it together).
• Dogs are good.
• That is all.

To my bro...

Happy birthday to my younger brother.  Although we fought a bit as kids, I also remember long lego building sessions, playing with matchbox cars, and general tomfoolery.  There would have been no cowboys and Indians without my brother playing the Indians; no army men without an enemy to blast.  Without him, I would never have learned how to share, despite getting my toys back broken.  He also taught me how to appreciate (and eat quickly) the food put in front of me -  before it was all gone.  We haven't always had the closest relationship, often going long periods without speaking.  But, we were fortunate enough to spend a vacation together last year, with our families, and it was a great time - and no toys were broken.  Made me wish we lived closer together.  Most importantly, I am very proud of my younger brother and the life that he has put together for himself - nice house, good job, and great family.  Again, happy birthday bro....you have a lot to be happy for.  And I hope we can get together more often and soon.

list Monday - Favorite Cereal

1. Apple Jacks
2. Frosted Flakes
3. Nut & Honey Corn Flakes (discontinued)
4. Alpha Bits
5. Froot Loops
6. Frosted Krispies
7. Cap'n Crunch Crunch Berries
8. Golden Crisp
9. Lucky Charms
10. Product 19

honorable mention:  King Vitamin

To Infiniti and beyond...

Josh's MLK Day writing assignment:

Unfair Treatment of Israel

By

Josh 

A world with Shalom, where Arabs and Jews won’t fight about there differences, but to learn about them, and become like one another.

A world with Shalom, and nobody will care what path of religious belief you take, but to live up to be good people, and be happy for you.

A world with Shalom, across the widest rivers of South America to the tallest mountains of Asia, let freedom ring.

A world with Shalom, and Israel can remain a country like any other and nobody says otherwise.

A world with Shalom, where Arabs can resect the people and buildings of Israel, and stop attacking.

Long live Jag...

... the jag is dead.

That's the last you'll ever see of the green machine.  On the back of a flatbed.  It died today, while driving home (early :< ) on the I5.  It almost made it to the dealership, but had to be towed.  Thanks to AAA.  Very sad.  And carless.

Mental Floss...

...because some things are meant to be digitalized.

List Monday - Favorite Comedians

Woody Allen:  A man goes to a psychiatrist and says, "Doc, my brother's crazy, he thinks he's a chicken." The doctor says, "Why don't you turn him in?" The guy says, "We would. But we need the eggs."  I was thrown out of NYU. On my metaphysics final, they caught me cheating. I looked within the soul of the boy sitting next to me.  I can't listen to that much Wagner. I start getting the urge to conquer Poland.  I'm very proud of my gold pocket watch. My grandfather, on his deathbed, sold me this watch.  In California, they don't throw their garbage away - they make it into TV shows.

Steven Wright:  I almost had a psychic girlfriend but she left me before we met.  OK, so what's the speed of dark?  How do you tell when you're out of invisible ink?  If everything seems to be going well, you have obviously overlooked something.  Support bacteria - they're the only culture some people have.  Shin: a device for finding furniture in the dark.
I intend to live forever - so far, so good.  Join the Army, meet interesting people, kill them.  If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends?  Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines.

Steve Martin:  What is a movie star? A movie star is many things. They can be tall, short, thin, or skinny. They can be democrats…or skinny.  How to make a million dollars: First, get a million dollars.  Boy, those French, they have a different word for everything!  First the doctor told me the good news: I was going to have a disease named after me.

Jerry Seinfeld:  I was the best man at the wedding. If I'm the best man, why is she marrying him?  It's amazing that the amount of news that happens in the world every day always just exactly fits the newspaper.   What is a date really, but a job interview that lasts all night? The only difference is that in not many job interviews is there a chance you'll wind up naked. You know you're getting old when you get that one candle on the cake. It's like, "See if you can blow this out."   Men want the same thing from their underwear that they want from women: a little bit of support, and a little bit of freedom.  Dogs are the leaders of the planet. If you see two life forms, one of them's making a poop, the other one's carrying it for him, who would you assume is in charge. 

Groucho Marx:  I wish you'd keep my hands to yourself.  Marriage is the chief cause of divorce.  Women should be obscene and not heard.  Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.  Here's to our wives and girlfriends...may they never meet!  A man's only as old as the woman he feels.  Although it is generally known, I think it's about time to announce that I was born at a very early age  I was married by a judge. I should have asked for a jury.  I never forget a face, but in your case I'll be glad to make an exception.

Dog Nights of Winter

So an otter and a sea lion walk into a bar.  Isn't that funny?  They're not even bi-peds.  Seriously, when Fozzie (old man dog) was young, he always reminded us of a mischievously playful otter.  Chubby, I mean Cubby, on the other hand, reminds us of a sea lion.  It could be worse.  I could've said walrus.  Picture our bed as a platform off of Pier 39 in San Francisco.  There's me, the wife, Fozzie, occasionally a kid or two lying around.  Cubby circles around the bed, like he's swimming on the carpet, waiting for an opening.  Then, he launches himself up on the bed and finds a cuddle spot - usually on someone's head.  But he doesn't stay very long and slips back down onto the watery carpets.  Sometimes he even tries to swim under the bed.  Maybe he's looking for fish.

Cubby's brother is a UKC Champion and is known as Bugsy Rockstar.  We got Cubby Cheesecake.

Little Poppa Bruce

Josh had to slick his hair back for some movie work - a 1950's scene.  He said, "I look like Poppa Bruce as a kid."  I think it was a compliment.  More details to follow.  UPDATE:  Josh couldn't stop telling people on the set that he really had Justin Bieber hair.  He couldn't wait to be able to flip his hair back and forth once more.

Lunch on Enron

Steph:  A soggy godmother is better than no godmother.

Josh, while watching Winter Wipeout:  They have all the weirdo's on this show.  Dad, you should try out.

Jillia Comaneci

My little monkey

Geni wednesday

So. Our recent trek to Phoenix coincided with the anniversary of my P's. Inevitably, the wedding album was broken out, complete with bride and groom in a champagne glass picture. Well, we happened to come across some antique relics: telegrams. We had to explain these to the next generation. Most of the grams were from well wishers who had been long forgotten. But one was signed, "your cousins Ethel and Louis Cohen.". A clue! A clue! Who are these people?

Transandentalism

Read an interesting phrase recently.  Au milieu de l'hiver, j'ai découvert en moi un invincible été.  Actually, I read it on a back tattoo.  Which got me thinking.  All this "end of times" talk had gotten me down.  Damn the Mayan prophecy and their catchy flute music - or is that the Incas.  Anyway,  I was going through withdrawals.  I needed some spiritual replenishment.  So, I took my female child to my secret beach.  And had a picnic.  She had two thermoses of chicken noodle soup and I had a bagel.  It was a brisk 73 degrees, but in the sun, it felt like a balmy 74.  There were even plenty of surfers to entertain.  The beach's beachiness was full of beachitude.  If you have the means, I highly recommend it.  It was a perfectly, rejuvenating afternoon.  Oh yeah, and that phrase from above translates as:  In the depths of winter I finally learned there was in me an invincible summer.  Thanks Camus.  And thanks girl child for going with me.

Not an ashtray.

List Monday - States of the Union

That I've been to:

• Arizona
• Arkansas
• California
• Colorado
• Connecticut
• Delaware
• Florida
• Georgia
• Hawaii
• Illinois
• Indiana
• Iowa
• Kansas
• Kentucky (only drove through, would go back)
• Louisiana
• Maryland
• Massachusetts
• Michigan
• Mississippi
• Missouri
• Nebraska
• Nevada
• New Jersey
• New Mexico
• New York
• N. Carolina
• Ohio
• Oklahoma
• Oregon
• Pennsylvania
• S Carolina
• Tennessee
• Texas
• Virginia
• Washington
• Wisconsin

That's 36 states.  72%.  I've also been to D.C. , Puerto Rico, and the U.S. Virgin Islands.  Top on my list of states I'd like to go to:   Alaska, Maine, or one of the big sky states (Montana, Wyoming or Idaho).  Favorites:  Cali, CT, & Oregon.  Least favorite:  Wisconsin, Ohio and Oklahoma.

Apocalypse amongst us?

Recently in the news:   throngs of red-winged blackbirds dead in Arkansas;  jackdaws dropping like fish out of the Swedish skies,  two million  (who actually counted?) fish (not Swedish) floating upside down in the Chesapeake Bay (the New York Bay would make more sense).  Teeming teams of deceased crabs washing up on England’s rocky (and now crabby) shores.  And the latest, thousands of turtle doves (thankfully Christmas has past) have fallen from the sky in Italy, like a meatball shower - if it actually rained meatballs and the meatballs were actually dead turtle doves.  No parmesan please.


Befuddled officials have done a not so-admirable job of fumbling for phenomenal explanations;  blaming the cold - because it never gets cold in the winter.  Well, I believe the cause of death for the birds was their impact with the ground.  The fish apparently drowned (or maybe a plugged in Magnutron was dropped into the frigid waters).  And the crabs were just too crabby (too much commotion surrounding the upcoming royal nuptials) and committed mass suicide.


Well, is it the End of Times?  Apparently for those creatures.  But not for the rest of us.  I still have mortgages to pay and another insufferable Flubbies season to suffer through.  As I've mentioned, when the Cubs win it all in 2012, I'll know, that the pre-historic predictions of the Mayans or Incas or Aztecs of old, were dead on.  Literally.

This is a stunt belly.  Not actually my actual belly.
Although, the beer looks pretty good.

Or maybe it is a sign, after all.  Because - are you sitting down blog readers? - (drumroll please), I have joined a gym.  Shocking.  It's opening near my house, at the bottom of the hill - near a nuclear power plant (well, not that near the plant).  But here's the best part:  it doesn't actually open for a few weeks.  So, I can say I belong to a gym without actually having to work out.  Best of both worlds.  When I do start to exercise, though, that might actually cause the apocalypse.  The end is near - for my gut, that is, not so much for the rest of you.  Although, some of you could probably stand some exercise.  And a beer.

Utilizing the collective brain power....

Today, drove up to Hollywood with my eldest to audition for the game show Brain Surge, as seen on Nick.  It's the game show where you don't have to know anything.  So, if we passed the audition, we should do really well.  If not, we'll get slimed!  Slimed I say.  Oh, the humanity.  And, as an interesting tidbit, the soundstage where we auditioned, used to be the very same stage where  the I Love Lucy show taped.  There was even a restaurant called the Babalu Cafe.  Pretty cool, right.

List Monday - Top TV shows, current

1. Entourage
2. Community
3. Weeds
4. 30 Rock
5. Daily Show
6. Cougar Town
7. Friday Night Lights
8. Modern Family
9. Rescue Me
10. How I Met Your Mother
11. oops, I forgot one:  Mad Men

honorable mention:  the old man show, the League, survivor

A milestone...

Seven miles inside the western Arizona border (near Quarzsite), the lovely bride's 2004 Lexus GX hit 200K. That's roughly eight times around the Earth, and only 38,000 miles short of the moon (sometimes, I'd like to send her to the moon).  Here's to another 200,000 miles of safe travels and exciting adventures. 

New Year's Day

Yeah...

All is quiet on New Year's Day

A world in white gets underway

I want to be with you

Be with you night and day

Nothing changes on New Year's Day

On New Year's Day

- U2

So I lied.   I'm baaaaaaaaaack.   I missed the old bloggy.  And I know some of you  did to.  Besides, there's so much more wisdom within, that I have to share.  Such as:  liquor before beer, have no fear; beer before liquor, never sicker.  Words to live by.  Anyway, we'll see if we can stick with the writing a little longer.  Changed up the look a little bit.  Gots to keep it fresh.


Ahhh, nothing says New Year's like chicken and waffles.  And not just any C & W, but Lo-Lo's (now in Scottsdale, but still ghettolicious).  Nothing quite as complimentary as the sugary-sweet syrupy waffles and the crispy, salty southern fried fowl.  Yum!  Even if we did have to wait something like 2 hours.  Thankfully, we all had pocket electronics.  (Also, enjoyed a really good meal at Tommy Bahamas the previous day.)


Brought in the new decade, with a spur of the moment trip to the Valley of the Sun.  Saw the P's for their anniversary pizza.  Saw the old neighbors in Scottsdale.  And spent NYE eating Chinese fooood and playing quarters, left-right-center, and thumper at a friend's house.  Good times.

So, stay tuned for more exciting bloglets...same blog channel, new look.  Enjoy.